Where My "no" Was Rejected

It was the summer of 2019 when I was 18 years old and was sexually assaulted. I went to a beach in Toronto with a boy and he had unconsensually and forcefully taken my clothes off. I had given him a clear word "no" several times but he did not stop. As a teenager I was very confused and made myself believe that it wasn't rape but after 3 years of running away from the truth I have finally accepted that it was, and began to start talking and healing from the experience. 

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Though I could not go to the specific beach as it is in Toronto, with the use of what I can access in Ottawa, I went to Mooney's Bay to capture some sounds that resonated with me with the experience. 

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I've always been an artistic person and love to express myself through all sorts of art but music particularly have always been a large part of me. Singing was and is still a way for me to cope with any pain that I experience. In this piece, you will hear me sing "Happier Than Ever" by Billie Eilish. The lyrics go "When I'm away from you, I'm happier than ever. Wish I could explain it better, I wish it wasn't true." I chose this song because I wish none of this reality were true. Regardless, it was a good exercise for me to talk about it in a creative way and in a way, it was a process of healing.